Healing High, Trauma Low

A magnolia tree in bloom. A branch with clusters of pink and white blossoms is pictured in the foreground with out of focus clusters in the background.
(2022) Magnolia tree in bloom.

A new path emerges buds appear signaling blooms and blossoming to anticipate. The path of healing felt promising. Rounding the corner from trauma and abuse retrospection showing me past thoughts and feelings — turning the spotlight from the self-loathing I once felt and shining it on the negative influences surrounding me at the time. Gazing at photographic mementos and seeing myself from a new perspective. Not ugly, nor hated and unworthy, but shining with perseverance, integrity, and will.

In this moment, I broke the mirror others handed me — one obfuscating my beauty, loved and worthy self. Negative influencers carcinogenic smoke clouding my reflection. Keeping me from authenticity.

We are not what others know — what they think they know. We are earth, we are air, we are fire, we are water, and we can build ourselves or we can tear ourselves apart.

This day in time, I chose me. Choosing to build the me I have understood. The manipulations and influences of the past disintegrated. New ways of abuse will come and I will be at the ready, ever-vigilant with grace and self-compassion.

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Queer Writer & Poet | Sex and Sensuality | Health and Wellness Interests | Personal Experience | LINKTR.EE/TOLBERTMBB | Instagram @tolbert_on_medium

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Tolbert

Tolbert

Queer Writer & Poet | Sex and Sensuality | Health and Wellness Interests | Personal Experience | LINKTR.EE/TOLBERTMBB | Instagram @tolbert_on_medium

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