Healing Yourself through Trauma and Negativity

Sunrise in the background with a pond and ducks swimming in the foreground.
  1. Ask a person you know — what is one good thing about me? Record their answer (by writing it down, audio recording, or typing it into a device), with their permission. Keep that answer with you and be reminded daily. The repetition of seeing/hearing this will eventually have you believing in this good thing about yourself and can be the foundation for you to build your confidence, trust, and seeing the goodness in yourself.
  2. If you are a writer or enjoy writing, write a positive affirmation for yourself each day, each week, each month, or each year. The affirmation does not have to be something you create, but can be a quote or idea from someone else that resonates with you. Run on this affirmation for however long it suits you and if it runs its course, find a new one. The affirmation can be a belief, a goal, a memory, a piece of art, a lyric, a quote, a thought, an idea that helps you center and focus on something positive.
  3. Have a favorite book, movie, food, band, song, art, hobby, etc…? Pick one favorite and indulge. Listen, watch, read, and do. Remind yourself of what you enjoy and how it feels to enjoy moments.
  4. Have a bucket list? Maybe you have always been interested in woodworking, but never took the time to learn? Pick one thing that feels right now and dedicate yourself to doing that thing, learning that thing, and crafting it into existence, even if only for a moment. Start with a book, YouTube video, documentary, or audio that provides basic instructions and organization to dip your toes in the water of that bucket (list).
  5. Struggle with doing things for yourself or by yourself? Make a list of these things. Then, figure out what one you can start doing on your own in that moment. Maybe it’s making a meal, cleaning the house, paying a bill? Whatever it is, you will feel a sense of accomplishment and self-respect for attempting to do something for yourself. It will also help you build a habit out of trusting yourself to take care of you.




Queer Writer & Poet | Sex and Sensuality | Health and Wellness Interests | Personal Experience | LINKTR.EE/TOLBERTMBB | Instagram @tolbert_on_medium

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Recommended from Medium

Positive Thinking Got You Down?

Woman working on computer looking frustrated and sad

Never Give Up, You’re So Much More

The Best Advice on Advice

Two women smiling drinking coffee and talking outdoors

Big Ideas: “How we can ban single-use plastic on the governmental level” With Author and Yoga…

14 Ways Emotionally Mature People Handle Disagreements Differently

Image of a woman warmly talking to a friend.

Overcoming stress with stretch

The Top 7 Skills You Need for a Recession

Get In The Zone With Vibrational Meditation

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store


Queer Writer & Poet | Sex and Sensuality | Health and Wellness Interests | Personal Experience | LINKTR.EE/TOLBERTMBB | Instagram @tolbert_on_medium

More from Medium

Poem: Longing for a Time Long Gone By

This poem begins with a circle of people contemplating a burning fire in awe at its majesty.

The Power of Conscious Feelings in Grief.

Embrace your superpowers